Letter to my heart

Wild and restless heart, can you hear the song of the world? Does it tell you all you need to know? Or does it only fill you with more wildness and restlessness?

Oh, I know, it’s so hard to keep quiet. Even when you have all the answers, the furious beat, the thrill of anticipation, the insatiable curiosity, the wonder of life – they all drive you to wish, to hope, to wonder.

For what? Gosh, oh Gosh, for everything. For all things alive and past gone, alive and still to come, alive and… Gosh, gosh, gosh. Alive.

But even as life strives for chaos, society does not. The laws of men demand a stillness, a calm, a structure that you will never be able to oblige to. Well, of course, the mind takes care of the seriousness of life, so society’s boredom is not really a worrying matter for you.

Except when nature takes over. When the fire inside of you ignites the fury of a thousand storms, and every overwhelming emotion spills through tears that are never, could never, be understood. They are not sad. They are not happy. They are everything. They are all, and they are nothing. They are all things alive and past gone, alive and still to come, alive and… Gosh, gosh, gosh. Alive. When it takes over, all of it, there’s no amount of rational thought that can stop you from being you.

No physical body will ever understand or feel the amount of pain, hate, fear, thrill, pleasure, love or happiness that you are able to create or undergo. No physical sensation equals the power of the emotions you can take, process, accept or invent. No mental deliberation is capable of grasping even the smallest fraction of what it means to be you, a wild and restless heart.

And how could you want anything less? No, for all heavens and lands that make this Earth so precious, never, never, never accept anything less than what you believe you deserve.

You are wild, my dear, wonderful heart. You are restless. You are curious. You are a true dreamer. You want a better world, and see if this Earth can stop you from getting one – if nothing else, because in the lack of offers, you create them, and no human soul can negate the power of what you fight for.

You want love, so you give it freely, without regrets. You want trust, so you confide your secrets to strangers. You want honesty, so you tell no lies. You want more understanding, so you put yourself in other people’s shoes. You want freedom, so you offer choices. You want the best, so you do nothing in half. You, my dear, dear heart, have seen and lived through so many tragedies and witnessed so much evil, cruelty, carelessness. You’ve been broken, abused, neglected. But you remain pure, and I, oh, I wish that you remain so for all eternity.

You are entitled to all the wildness you so relentlessly search for, my dear heart. Wild days, wild travels, wild adventures, wild songs, wild stories, wild feelings. And you are entitled to the calm, reflexive moments that are so important in this life: those indescribable moments when you can only hear the song of the world and nothing else. Then you are full, you are complete, and you don’t need to be wild anymore.

Until the song changes, and the search restarts. It’s an adventure. And you’re addicted to it as much as you are to the wildness and the restlessness that keeps you alive.

Gosh, alive.

Go on. Be wild. Be free.

Be alive.

And tell me all about it, so I can retell it all to the outside world.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s